The Movie: Wedding Crashers

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We just watched this movie again recently on cable and found the Reel Thing chances of John and Claire to be even lower than we thought after the first viewing.

Sure, John’s funny, easygoing and attentive, so we can see how Claire might find him a refreshing and amusing contrast to the humorless Zachary, whom she definitely doesn’t belong with either.  But that’s it.  Friends, yes.  Perhaps even brief lovers.  But The Reel Thing?  No way.

To begin with, a lifetime of partying and womanizing made the 10 or so year age gap between them look more like 20.  Claire is just about to start her life; John is a few receptions away from a Hep C prescription.   We guarantee once they get together he’ll stop crashing weddings and start crashing AA meetings. 

Furthermore, Claire is much stronger and more self-possessed than John.  When things don’t work out she goes on with her life; she doesn’t wallow in a bed of self-pity and snack food.  The guys works in investments – is this a sign of how he will behave in a few years when the economy tanks?

We found zero chemistry between these two, and think it is more likely that Claire would find the idea of sex with John pretty unappealing, even before she finds out how he spends most of his weekends.  When you’re a 20-something girl a 20-something bad boy can be dangerous and sexy.  A 40-something bad boy is just sad.

Even in the unlikely event that they were to get together we are pretty sure that her family will do whatever they can to break them up.  We’re still not sure how they let Jeremy slip through the cracks – secret service must have been off that day.  But they’ve probably accepted that Gloria is always going to be trouble.  Claire seems to be the darling of the family; they’ll want something better for her.

We see the relationship between John and Claire crashing and burning.

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